Yoga I - Not moving, but breathing (Fiona Agombar - For the Severely Affected)

There's a poem by Stevie Smith called 'Not waving but drowning' (it's a bit macabre so I've put it at the bottom of this post, don't read it if you're not feeling super happy and able to cope), the last couplet strikes a chord - "I was much too far out all my life, And not waving but drowning'. Speaking as someone who doesn't really have the energy spare to wave, it's more 'not moving but breathing' on most days, hence the title.

Dear Reader (yes you, my sole reader. Thank you.) - you're thinking - So, Yoga. You're kidding right? You can barely move, struggle to get around your 4 metre by 7 metre ground floor most days - seriously?

Ah well, this is where Fiona Agombar (who herself has ME/CFS, as well as Lyme's acquired at a later date, poor woman) comes in - she has a book 'Beat Fatigue With Yoga'.  Which is usefully split into Yoga things you can do if you're mild, moderate, severe or very severely affected with ME/CFS.

Huh. Right. Thinks Dear Reader. So this is where you tell me that all I need to do is buy a statue of Ganesh (NB: Hindu elephant god, I picked him cos his statue is rather cute), follow Yoga and I'll be cured?

'Snort' Hardly! There are no miracle cures for an illness that they have no idea how it's caused, still less how to treat it.  So no, it's not a miracle cure. I've no idea if it even works, but I'm starting it today and thought it would be interesting to see how it goes....

Also I am keen to try things that (a) don't cost much money and (b) are under my control with no-one telling me I didn't try hard enough (claiming it should work if I make enough effort) that (c) are going to make my life more comfortable.

Hmmm, ok, proceed, I'm listening but sceptical. Thinks Dear Reader (unless you've given up and fallen asleep).

Fair enough!

So onto the Yoga.

For the Severely Affected - (p179) in my 2006 edition book - there's 2 sorts of yoga, where you move and where you don't move.

I'm starting with the 'not moving' - which is breathing. Hey, I rock at breathing, I wake up doing it and the day goes from there. Off to a good start.  She does warn not to do the Kapalabhati breathing. So I won't.

So, Breathing is in Chapter 4. page 67.

Breathing is called Pranayama in Yoga. Prana is energy/ lifeflow and according to Yogic philosophy, can be controlled by breathing.  Oh apparently you have to learn how to breathe. so off to Chapter 2. (can you tell I've not actually read the book through? giggle)

So, Chapter 2 learning to breathe. Oh before you learn to breathe you have to learn to relax. On page 39.

There is a Pose of Complete Rest (Savasana for those who like to be able to name things).  Personally, having read it through, for me, this is quite energy-gobbling, so below I've given you an energy-saving version.

However, for those who are willing & able, Fiona says about how to do the Savasana, verbatim quote:

• Lie down on the floor or on your bed with your eyes closed.  Keep your legs slightly apart and your palms facing upwards. Wriggle your heels down to lengthen the space between your neck and shoulders.
• Now take yourself through each part of your body, tensing each muscle group then relaxing.  Starting with your feet, tense all the muscles in your toes, feet and ankles and then relax them. Now squeeze the muscles in your legs - your calf and thigh muscles - as tightly as possible and lift your legs up slightly from your support. Hold for a few seconds, then relax.  Pull your tummy muscles in, then relax.  Hold your arms out and make fists with your hands, then relax them.  Lift your shoulders up towards your ears then relax them downwards. Think about any tension in your back and shoulders and allow it to ease away as you sink into your support.  Now squeeze your face together as tightly as possible, then relax. Feel your jaw relax and the space between your eyebrows ease, and imagine someone is massaging your scalp so that all the tension in your face and head disappears.
• Try to relax as much as possible. Feel your whole body grow heavy as it sinks into your support - there is no need for you to hold onto any tension at all.  Pay particular attention to your jaw, shoulders, back and stomach - the areas where you carry the most stress.  Slow your breathing rate down and visualise releasing tension on each out-breath.

Well, oof!  I'm shattered just reading that - it's a bit, well, active.

So - my version is:

1. Go to the loo beforehand and make sure you're lying comfortably on your bed.
2. Relaxing often hurts so try and do it when your painkillers are working.
3. If you can lie on your back, great, maybe with your lower back, neck & head supported so you're not flat (cos then the back arches) but FULLY supported including pillows for arms and maybe even support under your knees. Basically, the bed & supports are holding all of you, not your own muscles.  Gravity is holding you down, you're a little squishy sandwich between the two.
4. Take yourself through each part of your body like Fiona says above, but don't do the tightening up first, just do the relaxing bit. You won't be able to relax all of your parts.
5. Relax your eyes.  Seriously. It's a weird feeling, and can be painful, but, if you relax your eyes, everything else relaxes in your face then onwards to the rest of your body.
6. If anything hurts when you relax it. STOP trying to relax it. Go back to your default tenseness, then gently try and relax again. then stop then relax and keep repeating but not enough to make yourself uncomfortable.

Sometimes I get a headache or other muscle pain from  relaxing. sigh. hence it's worth timing it to when your painkillers are working!

Hmm.  Having thought I was going to do a post about starting Yoga breathing exercises, turns out I've done a post about relaxing before you do breathing. Oh well... I shall be practising this for a while, then will move onto the actual breathing exercises next time...

This is Fiona Agombar's website: http://fionaagombar.co.uk/

You can buy her books/ DVDs through it, or at all good bookshops (and Amazon/ ebay second hand which is where I got mine).

One final thought, actually, the whole of the Stevie Smith poem is rather like me after I've been practising to relax - ow!  I am the moaning one...

 Not Waving but Drowning (Stevie Smith 1972)

Nobody heard him, the dead man,   

But still he lay moaning:

I was much further out than you thought   

And not waving but drowning.

Poor chap, he always loved larking

And now he’s dead

It must have been too cold for him his heart gave way,   

They said.

Oh, no no no, it was too cold always   

(Still the dead one lay moaning)   

I was much too far out all my life   

And not waving but drowning.