Independent Living - First Steps in stopping your house eating your energy - Letting Go

The elephant in the room. The big issue. The one that stops most of us actually getting rid of stuff whilst knowing that if we bring more stuff in (which doesn't stop us), eventually we won't be able to get in the house. There won't be space.

In a word, emotion.  Emotions, in various forms stop us getting rid of our stuff. And emotions, in various forms, make us get more stuff.


Over the years I've watched a few 'hoarder' programmes on the TV. And marvelled, with a 'there but for the grace of God go I' shudder, at how it got that bad for those people, how they got where they are now, in a totally overwhelming situation. At first I was somewhat sceptical about the 'psychotherapy' side of the shows. But as I've watched more, and had problems in life myself, yup, it's true (for me at least) - stuff becomes more important and decisions harder to make when life gives you lemons.

So, how to let go?

Apartment Therapy's January Cure Assignment #4 HERE suggests setting up an Outbox.

This can either be an actual box - cardboard or a plastic crate. Or, alternatively a space in your house that you don't mind being messy and chaotic for a while.

How to use an Outbox (box or area)?

An Outbox is NOT a rubbish bin. It's where you put an item or items until 'their fate has been decided' according to Apartment Therapy.

So if something is definitely rubbish - put it straight into the bin, if something is definitely recyclable - put it into the recycling box, if you know you don't want it - put it in a bag for charity.  And if you know you definitely want to keep it - keep it.

In essence the Outbox is for stuff that you are not sure about - maybe it has memories attached, or it cost a lot of money, or you might use it, or it just needs a bit of repair and so on. Basically the stuff that pretty much stops you getting on with decluttering and sorting your house out.

OUTBOX RULES
1. Anything can go in the Outbox
2. The Outbox is allowed to get messy
3. Everything must stay in the Outbox for at least one week
4. After that time you have several choices

• Take anything back out
• Leave anything you are undecided about for one more week
• Dispose of the rest by moving to the recycling bin or giveaway pile 

 Apartment Therapy's rules

Apparently, by separating yourself from the item first, it's easier to get rid of it.  Only time will tell....

Anything else?

Yes. Don't just set up the Outbox (box or area). Put ONE ITEM in it. Right now (or pick one mentally and get your carer to do it at their next call).

So how's that working out for you personally?

Well, as part of the parentals picking up an Ikea Shoe Cupboard for me whilst they were there, and a friend assembling it in my bedroom a week or so ago, the upstairs corridor got rearranged. The shoes and nasty falling apart shoerack was gone. In the space where the shoes used to be, I put an empty cardboard box. An Outbox. Quite a big one.

Before Christmas all the stuff that didn't belong in the living room was dumped on the spare room floor. Then on a different day to the 'shoe cupboard' last week, a friend helped (as in did all the work, I sat on the floor pointing and saying 'no, there, no, there, yes!') clearing the floor on the spare room by piling things up at the sides (mostly empty packaging to be used for ebay) so there's enough space for ironing can be done in there.

As part of that, my cardboard Outbox was filled up with books for ebay or charity shop. These books were chosen about 2 years ago, but nothing's happened since...  The intention is to pick a book out and see if it's worth ebaying - if it's not, stick it in the charity bag, if it is, stick it on ebay. One at a time, as convenient.

Kerching! I have a full Outbox and an entire Spare Room as Outbox. 

No pictures til later. I'm downstairs, the Outboxes are upstairs...